The Farley Files: Matt Farley’s Mausoleum of Madness

The Farley Files: Matt Farleys Mausoleum of Madness

Spencer Garrison, Writer, Editor, Researcher

June 3, 1978, a boy is born. He is to be raised in Massachusetts, in a town not far from Westborough. In the year of 1996 this person graduates from Bishop Fenwick High School, and only four years later he graduates from Providence College in Rhode Island. This man will be a musician, an artist, and soon he will begin losing his mind. Now, you might wonder who he is? The man is Matt Farley.


Authors Note:

Writing this article has always been a passion project of some sort. Farley is an elusive, niche character. Much of the fame he has found was not even under his own name. However, I am more than happy to have been able to put in the research required for this article. Maybe Farley isn’t as crazy as I suspect him to be. But, one thing I know for sure, is that his work is destroying him. That is all. Enjoy reading this article. 

-Spencer Garrison


The Beginning


     Matt Farley was born with a passion for music. That much can be inferred from the fact that he’s written and produced over 22,000 songs as of now. But at what point does a passion fall to pieces? At what point does it stop being what it was and consume you? Farley’s career started off with a small band known as “Moe’s Haven.” This band was founded in 1996 with fellow band member, Tom Scalzo. According to some sources, he only started his “real”work in 2008. But, I will get to that in due time. Moe’s Haven had reached very minimal popularity and to this day has only performed live about three times. I theorize that during this time period Matt Farley was enjoying making music and writing songs that he cared about. This is not to say he wrote very few songs; in fact, during the year of 2006 they released an entire album a month. Whether this is part of the band’s style or a grab at cash, I am unsure of. However, I do know that the true avarice has yet to settle. 


Mouth of the Cave


     It was 2008 when Matthew unknowingly began what I will refer to as, “The Descent.”  He discovered that songs by “Moe’s Haven”gained significantly more traction than normal songs he put out.  This was the beginning of a maddening cycle that would ultimately turn Matt Farley into the sixty-five thousand dollar a year empire he is now. But, also a mad man. So, what was this first step into the darkness? A song by the name of “I Love Hugh Grant.” Nothing serious to Matt Farley or Tom Scalzo. But to their surprise, the song started making  74 cents a month. But how did 74 cents turn into 65,000 dollars? Matt Farley brought an interesting mentality towards his work. He didn’t think: “What if I could make a few more higher quality joke songs that raked in more money?” He thought, quote, “Most people would quit, but I was like, if I can make 20,000 songs that are as successful as ‘I Love Hugh Grant,’ I’ll be doing pretty well!” It was this mentality that carried him to where he is now. But where does the insanity come in?


The Bottomless Pit


If you cast a look upon Matt Farley now, you will see a broken, shattered man. The bright eyed, outgoing musician, Matt Farley, has lost his spark, or, so I believe. Matt stumbled upon his sell-out spam writing 14 years ago, the new philosophy Matt Farley has taken towards his work has stolen his soul. While Matt Farley has always been a prolific creator, even appearing on the Jimmy Fallon show as an, “Instant Songwriter.” However, it is the nature of his work that changed when he made his revelation. While before he’d write songs about things he’d actually care about with his small band, he now focuses on one thing: making money. Anyone who takes a look at the new and unimproved Matt Farley will notice that this change has hurt him. In the most recent interview with Matt Farley I could find, his words revealed a dark truth: “I wish I could make the good songs all the time, but they literally make no money and it’s devastating.” Matt Farley is a slave to his own creations. He is a slave to money. Even when he wants to stop singing songs that are nothing more than the lowest common denominator of music, he is unable to. One more thing I noticed, during the entire interview, Matt Farley looks past his interviewer, and with dead eyes, he stares into the pit, the pit which has swallowed him whole. The abyss. A godless place. And he stares, for he knows, when the interview is over, he will have to make another mockery of his own talent. Forevermore.


The Climb?


All is not lost for the Farley fellow because, now that Matt Farley has written 20,000 songs, he says that he feels that he can be a little more liberal with the content he creates. While this news is hopeful, a quick search to his YouTube channel(s) show that he is still uploading daily on many of his… less creative channels. I do not know whether this is a deliberate choice, or a relapse, for who can ever know what really goes on in the troubled mind of Matt Farley? I only hope that he can circumvent the tragedy that has befallen him.